I Have A Dream

I apologise in advance for the post you are about to read, it is a perfect example of what I fear is quickly becoming the ‘theme’ of my blog- me having a bitch about things that piss me off. Today’s topic is dreams, and I don’t mean dreams and aspirations, I’m referring to those peculiar little movies that play in our head as we sleep.

I have no problem with dreams, in fact I quite like some dreams- especially those ones where you can fly and have magical powers and are really rich and can beat up all the people you don’t like and have amazing sex with hot celebrities… ok you get the point. I have always been fascinated by the fine line between waking up and realizing that didn’t actually happen, however putting all that aside it is important to remember that dreams are an entirely personal experience which no one else can understand seeing as its not their brain doing the dreaming. This brings me to my point, I DON’T GIVE A F*** ABOUT YOUR DREAMS.

When was the last time you were enthralled by a person recounting their previous night’s epic dream about plucking out belly button lint? I’m going out on a limb here but I’m guessing that you don’t have treasured memories of friends telling you about their fantastic dreams. ‘Why is this?’ I hear you ask. It’s actually very simple, although you may consider yourself a great friend and an active listener you simply don’t give a f***. And why would you? Basically the person explaining the dream is trying to pour out the contents of their head onto the table for you to sift through without the proper medical training. Dreams only mean something to the person who dreamt them, except in the case of people who have dreams where Satan orders them to kill people, in these rare cases the dreams also matter to the people on the death list.

It would be nice for everyone to take a second and think twice before uttering the phrase, ‘I had a really interesting dream last night.’ I would rather be slapped in the face then hear about your dream, seriously just slap me, I’ll thank you for it.

Do twins even care about each others dreams?